Tell us about somethign you should do… but dont.
I SHOULD be
Makin’ paper- QUIT my minimum wage job, get some sort of food/BAR-ish setting job to make some dough in. Sure, when I lived on the coast I worked @ four different restaurants- but I SUCKED. was fired from one, quit one of them because I thought the cook was harassing me (C’mon, 19 year old Nerissa- what cook isn’t a perve-), and the other 2- one closed, and who knows if they even remember me @ the other one?
I got too nervous all the time when I was a waitress that I fucked shit up like a motherfucker. It was baad. But I have-since then, have had about 5 or so jobs since then, and yesterday I was so fucking disrespected by one of my “SUPERIORS [HAHAHAHAH]” it was No fuckin’ joke, folks.
People tell me all the time I should just bartend, waitress-whatever (“you have boobs and you’re a girl, c’mon-” is every male’s conclusion), but that aint enough haha, every job I look for you need EXPERIENCE (always written in CAPS LOCKS, too). I want to say I am experienced, but I sucked ass, so “can you guys still train me?!” hahah. WHAT TO FUCKING DO?!!!
- WORK OUT MORE
- HANG OUT W/ PEOPLE I LOVE MORE- one of the hesitations i have though is that they don’t call ME. it’s okay, ya know- i might not call them either. I should just fuckign do it. I shouldn’t let loneliness become a contributor to suicidal ideations.
- WAKE UP earlier
- READ MORE
- COOK MORE
- KEEP UP WITH MY GANGSTA STATUS. <————— and that’s REAL. cuz I KEEPS it real. I dont give a fuck fuck- i dont give a fuck that I’m extremely white- although, i do tan well! hahah I can here Chappelle using his “white person” voice right now
But really, I’m gonna just keep wakin’ up & shit. There’s a point to all this. I gotta tell myself this often- and it’s about time I start believin’ it